Hi Everyone!! I have been thinking of this almost daily! I am almost through writing my protein review. Unjury is the winner for me for taste, texture, and great customer service. (you can return anything even if it is open)
Unfortunately we don't have internet right now which is why i have not been updating. I started my liquid diet on Thursday and it has been HELL for me. Its not so much that i feel hungry, it is just the holiday season, and the end of the semester which means FOOD! I did not realize what a strong relationship i had with food. The hardest day for me was on Tuesday. Tuesdays and Thursdays are my 12 hour days where i got to my practicum site, see clients and then go to school at night. Tuesday there were donut boxes all over my practicum site, which i could mostly avoid walking by. But the most difficult was at school. 1st i met for my last supervision which had little caesars pizza, breadsticks (my favorite), and wings. Then a classmates romanian mother made this filo dough esq with homemade pudding and homemade whipped cream. Everyone was oohing and aahing about how amazing it was. I suffered through that. Which of course the people in supervision kept asking if i wanted things to which i replied "no thank you i am undergoing a procedure that restricts my diet." Then the worst as if that was not bad enough. My class for children and family... the teacher brought specialty pizzas from plum market. 2 were vegetarian, another one had chicken. They smelled amazing. Then there was salad, an apple pie, and some other dishes. By that point i had eaten my supply of food that i brought and was ravenous. I don't know how i made it through Tuesday. Tuesday was the most difficult day thus far. Wednesday my friends had us over to their new house, and they ordered Chinese food. They had to order general tso's chicken (my favorite) so my husband and i left. As of today i have 5 days left until the BIG day and as time is progressing i am feeling ambivalent. I get waves of nerves where i am afraid to die, and wonder how can i give up my foodie friends? Then i question why am i doing this? My husband is supportive either ways, and keeps assuring me that he loves me how i am now. How will he feel after i change? I talked to my grandmother last night who made me feel a bit better. She got the RNY 20 years ago (i am getting the sleeve.) She said that she can still eat pizza occasionally but that instead of 4 slices she has one, and probably not the crust. She still eats pasta sometimes, and chinese. She said that i just have to get past my liquid phases and eventually i can eat my favorite foods again just not all the time. That made me feel better. We have a dry erase board in our kitchen. On it i wrote "This liquid diet is temporary. You will get to eat your favorite foods again (Just not all the time)." And somehow just hearing that made me feel better. As of today i am proudly marching towards Wednesday. The day when my life will change. When diabetes will no longer be knocking on my door. I can do this and so can you all. I can't find my scale and so as of today i have no idea how much weight i have loss in a week if any. I feel lighter and my wedding band fits again. So i just have to keep reminding myself of that.
A favor to you: Please tell me about your surgery, and why you got it and what gave you the strength to push on. What do you like and not like about yourselves after the fact? If you are going into this why?
December 14th, 2011 that is the day that Amber changes hopefully forever.
I will update when i can. As for now... I will be thinking of you guys.
P.S. Would you like me to video update??